Poet·ings

Hello friends,

September often brings the possibility of new beginnings, even as we return to work, college or school. It’s a chance to reset and try something different. Or maybe reconnect with old habits that fell by the wayside. I’ve been working on rebuilding my daily writing habit - just seven minutes at breakfast. After finishing my toast and marmite, I set a seven-minute timer on my phone and let thoughts flow through my pen. Sometimes it’s the start of a poem, sometimes a character study. It doesn’t matter what it is, just that it’s written.

It feels good to make that commitment to myself and my writing. I hope I can keep it up.

Some thoughts on… parental worry

I loved reading this article on Rob Reiner in The Guardian. I might have scrolled past but the description of him as a ‘nepo baby’ drew me in. And whilst it was fascinating to read about his career and Hollywood lineage, it was what he had to say about the relationship between parents and their children that stayed with me.

There was one line in particular that really struck a chord. Reiner recalls his father saying ‘I’m not worried about you’ when he finally realised his son had chosen the right path.

‘I’m not worried about you’. As a parent I spend so much of my time worrying about my kids, especially now that my youngest is just a few months off adulthood. I’m constantly worrying about whether I’ve given them the tools they need to thrive, and I’m not convinced that I have. Partly I think it’s because I’m always trying to problem solve for them, trying to help them navigate the day in ways that have been, perhaps, too hands on. Not having the courage to let them make their own mistakes and figure things out. Not trusting that when things go wrong they have the capacity to get themselves back on track.

To be fair, I spend a lot of my time worrying full stop. So although I don’t think I’ll ever stop worrying that I haven’t quite nailed this parenting lark, I do hope I get to the point where I can say to both my kids, ‘I’m not worried about you’.

What am I up to?

I’ll be sharing poems in the following places this October, come along if you can.

Elevate Symposium: Reclaiming Narratives Wednesday 12 October, 10am-2pm, Tales Without Borders, Blyth
PWYC from £5, find out more here.

Lion & Lilac presents a Black History Month Special Wednesday 16 October, 7pm, North Shields & District Men’s Catholic Club
Book via Eventbrite, £5+ booking fee

TWOOMPH! Thursday 24 October, 6.30pm, online
You can book a free ticket here (or make a donation if you’ve a bob or two spare).

Or if you’re just looking for a small dose of poetry, you can read my poem ‘The Humanist’ from my collection Proof of Life on Earth here on the Oxford Brookes website.

Study the trees…

If you’re a worrywart like me, finding an outlet can really help. At the moment I’m trying to reestablish a meditation habit so that I can let go of worry a little more easily when it enters my mind. Another source of comfort in times of worry is, of course, poetry. Reading it, listening to it. Whatever is troubling me, chances are there’s a poem that will ease my mind a little.

I like poetry that makes it easier to bear the madness of the world, and the poetry of CAConrad is filled with rage and optimism and beauty. I was lucky enough to discover their work when I stepped in to chair a panel with CAConrad, Len Pennie and Kayo Chingonyi at Newcastle Poetry Festival earlier this year.

This poem GOLDEN IN THE MORNING CRANE OUR NECKS was recorded for the brilliant Read By series from the Adrian Brinkerhoff Foundation. It’s filled with remarkable images and an undying hopefulness. I love the lines ‘take our time studying tees to imagine the / nests we would build if we were birds’.

I hope you find it hopeful too. Or maybe that should read helpful.

I’d love to hear if you’ve come across a poem or a song recently that make you feel hopeful. Let me know if you have!

Take good care,
Degna


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